Awaiting N’s arrival I prepared myself for changing nappies. I’m not an overly squeamish person and felt pretty confident in my abilities to not puke on my newborn upon changing them. Changing N in hospital after birth was the first nappy I had ever changed and I got through 4 of them in 1 go. He would not stop pooping. I now know this is normal after birth but at the time it was slightly frightening. It also set me up with a very skewed view of his future poops. They get a lot smellier and weirdly brighter, considering all they drink is milk.
The first few days N was alive, changing his nappy was a 2 man operation and took about 30 minutes start to finish. It typically involved one of us gagging and stepping away for a moment (usually J), at least half a pack of wipes and a baby grow that had to be removed/possibly thrown out. We only figured out after about a week that N kept soaking his clothes because his willy was pointing upwards (how silly we didn’t think of that?). Be prepared for poo to get everywhere. Up their back, on their feet, inbetween their toes ( they seem to love to put their feet in it when you open their nappy), their belly and of course, all over their clothes. I once cut N out of his babygrow car crash victim style because I couldn’t face pulling it over his head. You try your hardest to roll their babygrow up far enough that’s it out of the danger zone but inevitably, it finds it. Also, if you have a boy, remember to hold their willy down whilst changing them or they will wee into their own faces (mouths) and probably yours. True story.
*Update* Last night N’s poo had exploded (the only explanation I can think of) and gone up his back, up his front and into his belly button. It was late at night so we ditched all hope of wiping him clean and J held him over the bath whilst I showered him off. Not our proudest parenting moment.